plasticwrap

Death by Taxes

Memo to the government and to the members of FOE (Fight Obesity Epidemic) regarding their proposal in the news the other night: If you want to reduce obesity, particularly among the poor, lower the cost of healthy foods. Don’t raise the price of food, we’re struggling as it is – just give beneficiaries vouchers for say, $10 worth of fresh fruit and vegies a week, redeemable at major supermarkets. For pity’s sake, protein and vegetables are expensive! The cheapest food in terms of kilojoules per dollar is carbohydrate, preferably coated in fat. The cheapest cuts of meat are fatty. On almost everything (including powdered drink mix!) you pay a premium for sugar-free, low-fat, lite-reduced-ultra-slim-options.

Late night TV – and especially the ads – is very compelling. It’s really fortunate that I am too destitute to qualify for even the most extortionate of credit cards, because otherwise I would be drowning in revolutionary make-up and magnetic bed-spreads. The strange thing is, I read a lot of science magazines and stuff, and yet I never see any of these miracle breakthroughs reported. You’d think that a book that told you how to cure every known type of cancer or a magnetic bedspread that can cure pain would really stir up some interest in the mainstream media, but I never hear a peep. Maybe the science journalists are getting their optimal 8.3 hours of sleep and don’t watch infomercials.

Deb is also easily influenced by infomercials. The downside is that she has a credit card. She buys things that turn up 6-8 weeks later and she can’t remember what she ordered. Most of it goes back. The other week she ordered some make-up and when it was delivered the courier left it on the porch. The dogs got it - $98 worth of make-up scattered across the yard. Luckily it was one of those all-natural-organic ranges, so it probably just made their coats extra shiny. “My, Millie, your spots are looking extra fetching today!” “Why thank you, Charlie Brown, and may I say that the new blush really highlights your nostrils?”

Oh – movie recommendation: The Butterfly Effect. It’s got that guy that plays Kelso on That 70’s Show in it, and he’s a surprisingly good serious actor! The gist of the movie is that a boy grows up and discovers a way to go back in time and affect his past, and therefore the past/future of those around him. It’s very much like that The Simpson’s episode where Homer gets his hand stuck in the time-travel toaster. Has kind of disturbing adult themes and a bit of surprising violence (non-gratuitous) but it’s really well done – I enjoyed it. The ending was particularly good and non-syrupy.

The dresses the women wear for the medal ceremonies are so unflattering! Are they reproductions of ancient Greek dresses? I find it hard to believe that the people that designed such beautiful architecture had so little dress sense. The outfits come into the category “Ancient Greece meets English Middle Ages smashed into American Wild West”. The poor women! An audience of millions and you’re having your 15 minutes of fame in a TinkyWinky costume. And speaking of which (my brain aroused somewhat belatedly): why no men holding the medals? I’m sure I could design an ugly outfit for the guys. I’m thinking tri-corner hat and Elizabethan ruff teamed with a charming paisley toga and perhaps winklepickers to complete the look.

After reading my comments I am stuck trying to think up a clever title for this post.

Posted by phreq at August 26, 2004 04:42 PM | TrackBack