August 30, 2008

Unfamiliar

I'm feeling uncharacteristically shy and uncertain about the Swing dance ball tonight. It's been interesting to me to recognise my reluctance to stand out in this situation. usually I love the idea of dressing up and being flamboyant, but in this case I'm not brave enough. There are a few reasons I can immediately put my finger on:

->I'm new to the crowd, I don't know that many people, and although the ones I have met are all lovely I am worried that they will somehow be mean. This is a ridiculous worry, so I shall ignore it.

->My dress/hair/makeup/shoes will be wrong. Normally I wouldn't worry about this *at all*, but I am trying to recreate a vintage look. I am trying to look like someone from 60-70 years ago, and I don't have a very clear visual in my head of what I should be trying to achieve. Unfortunately Charm School kind of just emphasised all the ways I'm doing it 'wrong'. Again this is a pretty silly thing to be worried about. I can't afford to buy actual vintage clothing, so I will have to do my best with modern aproximations. I will do my best and look awesome anyway.

->I can't dance well enough. This is mostly a knowledge thing, I know I can do what I've learned so far well enough but I've only been dancing for a few months, so I haven't really learned that much. This is alright because I don't have to know too much anyway, the lead does the hard work, I just have to follow.

So yeah, maybe if I knew a few more people going I wouldn't worry at all, but here I am feeling shy, which is new and different to me and almost dreading the ball I've been looking forward to.

I am going to tap on this a bit and then I'm going to concentrate on writing instead. Worrying after all, will get me exactly nowhere.

Charm School was pretty fun, but I would have got more out of it if my hair was longer. We learnt pin curls, victory rolls, sweeps and rolls and listened to a talk about fashion. I bought some setting spray and some cuban heel pantyhose. Man I wish I had long hair again.

PoF: robe
CO: not reading the pre-release draft of Midnight Sun Stephenie Meyer has put on her website. It's so bad it's good.

Posted by jenni at August 30, 2008 10:08 AM
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