Niggly mucus in throat makes me cough quite frequently. Nose periodically blocks up then requires blowing.
Head stuffed with playdough. Logical thought possible, motivation lacking, asbtract thought exhausting.
As such I shall blog about how the Nasty Vulture Ladies have begun to train their young to be nasty vulture children.
The Nasty Vulture Children have been schooled to come up to the desk and ask to see the DVDs that have been returned but aren't yet on the shelves, this means the DVDs that have been returned in the last five minutes.
When we check and there aren't any they don't believe us. The Nasty Vulture Children don't like the hundreds of videos and DVDs on display, they want the fresh carrion, like Nasty Vulture Mummy eats. They suspect us of hoarding the best DVDs behind the desk out of reach. I guess they think we make big piles of the coolest DVDs and then sleep on them, like the Library Dragons we are.
These NVC also have particular stamps that are their favourites. They *have* to have Thomas the Tank Engine, for example. If that stamp isn't on offer, they demand it in an increasingly loud and annoying squawk. There will be tears and tantrums if the correct stamp isn't applied to the Nasty Vulture Claw.
~ I have met one in particular who likes having stamps so much he gets stamps and then licks his hands until the stamps aren't there anymore. Then he gets more stamps. I would'nt allow this kind of repulsive behaviour myself, but then I am not the mother of a small vulture.
Then there are the children who have somehow been taught (and who can guess who taught them?) that if they give something up, they will never get it back. With these kids the library is quite a problem, because think about it. In a library when you have found the book/video/DVD/magazine you want you then *give it to a librarian to scan*.
So, if you have found an exceptionally important Thomas the Tank Engine book (for example) and you believe that once you stop touching it you will never get it back, you're not about to hand it over to some librarian are you?
Then, when your Nasty Vulture Mummy pries it out of your little hands and gives it to said librarian, what is your best course of action?
You guessed it. Scream for all you are worth. Scream as if your heart had been torn out and shown to you. Scream as if you could break all the windows in the building if you just got loud enough.
.
My ears are still ringing.