I’m sick of being in pain. It’s not making me stronger, it’s not making me a better person. It’s making me tired and grumpy and miserable.
When I bend my knees, it’s like when someone bends your fingers back further than they are meant to go. That kind of pain. Then it starts to feel like someone is trying to yank off my kneecaps. If I crouch lower, it feels like my knees are being crushed.
Walking up stairs it’s like there is sand in the joints, grinding between the bones.
When I’m sitting it’s a pain like when you hit your thumb with a hammer, when your hands are really cold. That kind of pain, but instead of lasting for a moment it is stretched out over minutes, or hours.
Sometimes at night I wake up with a pain like toothache. Just to the left of my right kneecap.
I'm taking painkillers, going to physio, doing all the exercises... nothing seems to help. It's getting worse.
Someone posted one of your poems on the livejournal community nz_poetry :)
Posted by: suraya at August 28, 2007 11:54 AMHi Fionnaigh
Ar you still in pain? Hope not .. but ... I used to get knee pain ..seemed to be pseudo arthritis -or retro virus - where a virus like a cold gets into the joins & causes inflammation. Anyway, it got worse if I drank coffee or had too much chocolate (inflammatory substances) but got better if I increased the fish oil intake & natural anti-inflammatories like apples, rock melon & green tea. I also found a joint supplement with glucosamine & chondroitin helpful.
Hope to see you next week at Tim's poetry launch. He's stressing out cos the printer hasn't finished the books yet!
Cheers
Kay
I saw that you linked to my blog. Thanks so much. I wish that words I could write would make the pain easier. I wish that there was something I could say. Something that anyone could say. But I don't think that there is. Just know that you are not alone, that you don't have to think it makes you stronger, that it sucks, and, I hope, that you can still have hope that it will get better someday. I hope that for you. And I love the title of this blog.
With peace and hope for healing, Elizabeth