No, really. Why do we have sex?
There are some obvious answers:
* intimacy
* libido
* cause that is what we do on Saturdays (or Wednesdays or whenever)
* procreation
* to make someone feel better (many variants, including getting to do something one is good at, and indulgence)
* the joy of it (whether that be art, relationship or whatever)
* religion (a minority in this readership I'm guessing)
* boredom
* to take a walk on the wild side
* to make someone else jealous
* to express fantasy
* for exercise
* for somewhere to sleep
but I assume everyone has their own reasons...
I'm curious about motive in sex. When is sex selfish (when isn't it!). When is it unethically selfish? When is it more about generosity than anything else. When is it for tactical reasons (money, to cement a relationship, to have children)?
How do you check in on the ethics of someone else, and is that any part of your business if you don't mind the behaviour?
Is ethical sex any better than unethical sex?
My only conclusion so far is that the interplay between people is the most important thing. That these are fluid decisions and woefully difficult to navigate. Which leads me to conclude (this late on a Friday) that knowing your own relationship to sex and your own morals, desires and motivations is desparately important. In a negotiated situation, you need to have faith in your position (though that can put you at risk if you loose the negotiation).
Apologies in advance for askign questions rather than providing content, but Meh! and my cat would say.
Posted by carla at August 9, 2003 01:16 AM